I don’t know where I will be in four months. Two weeks ago, I did not know where I would be next month. I don’t know when I will have paid work again or what that work will be. I still don’t know what I’m going to be when I grow up.
But, I’m learning to be okay with “I don’t know”. Struggling against “I don’t know” only causes a lot of mental anguish. Trying to fill in the blank spaces created by “I don’t knows” takes up time that could better be spent enjoying the present the here and now.
There is freedom to be found in releasing the need to know what is next or in trying to have the answer to every question. “I don’t know” means the path is undetermined and anything can happen. I try to find the spaciousness within “I don’t know”, and then relax into the unlimited possibilities of it. “I don’t know” is not a problem that always needs a fix. “I don’t know” is an invitation to be awed by the mysteries of life.
Based on a journal entry from 7.24.12
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